Sex without love is a meaningless experience,
but as far as meaningless experiences go
its pretty damn good.– Woody Allen
from 1981, Do Me Baby
The Moral Compass of Making Love Versus Sex for Sport
written & edited by Kendall F. Person
The loving couple jumped the broom, turned and faced their guests and were soon pronounced husband and wife (and where same sex unions are legal and recognized, an identical ritual applies). They laughed among friends and cried in the embrace of their family. Today was the happiest day of their life and the first day that they would spend the rest of eternity together. They were toasted by the best man and maid of honor, they danced together under the spotlight and when he carried her off, they made love under the moonlight.
Years later, they had still loved only one another, but to keep the flame alive, they began games of role play underneath the covers. She would dress as a french maid and he would sometimes play the role of sex slave. They would laugh and giggle after the explosion, and fall asleep deep in one another’s arms. They experimented with swinging, exchanging partners with other loving couples, all certified and tested, clean of all diseases. But no matter the feelings of ecstasy they found in the arms of another, no one could take the place of their one and only lover.
The idea of sexual relations is so varied among religions that it is virtually impossible to include an acceptable analogy under one cover. Even the concept of adultery is difficult to ponder, when some cultures allow for more than one wife, where in others, this is strictly forbidden. In most religions, all are called upon to obey the law of the land, but some laws, even for a loving homosexual relationship, calls upon death. Some churches believe that even sex among heterosexuals, is only for procreation. So would either of these categories fit, or is it sex simply for nature?
Using animal kingdom as a guide? Good luck. The most elegant of big cats, the cheetah, is a promiscuous lot, and have no idea who their baby daddy could be. The emperor penguin, however, mates for life, but even in their traditional courtship, it is the father that gives its life to protect the egg, the beginning of life. Hyenas are a matricidal clan, who not only relegate the males to second class citizens and to live as a separate bunch, but produce so much testosterone, their sex organs resemble and are as big as the male counterpart. Bull elephants enter into a blind rage, mounting anything in their path to satisfy their natural urge.
The collegiate, passed the stage of peer pressure as a resort, has moved into age of experimentation, where many view sex as a sport. But even then, wrapped in the arms of embrace, there is a sense of love during the ritual of sex. A mother who engages in sex for pay, no other option to feed her kids. A lonely man who entertains himself, there are those who believe, that self-gratification is a sin and a segway to hell.
In the end, the practice of consensual sex among adults is prone to individual feelings and emotions based on beliefs, education, upbringing and ultimately whether sex should be as sedate as love making between two married, hetersexual adults simply to procreate, or an outlet of expression, a release of energy and a personal choice?. The moral compass of making love versus sex for sport comes down to one very real thing: how do we feel when the act is over. Are we ashamed of what we did? Can we not look in the mirror at ourselves and do we want our partner, whom we have just shared our most intimate being, to stay around or simply disappear.
this is … The Neighborhood